My Ideal Apartment

We finally found a nice service apartment with reasonable price in Beijing and I would have to say this is my ideal apartment especially now I do think of buying a small space for myself. What I need is a separate living room, kitchen, bedroom and bathroom. Th space is about 70 square meter and it's really sufficient for one person or even two.




I actually was thinking if open kitchen would work for me as some of my favorite dishes are stir fry but that might be good to push me to adopt healthier cooking methods.


As to the bedroom, the most important part for me is the bed. I need a comfortable mattress, bed sheet, pillow and quilt to really have a good night sleep and rest. More importantly is the CARPET. The one they have in the bedroom is really very nice.


The last one is bathroom with BATHTUB. A bath at the end of the day can really help me release the stress and also can help blood circulation.

I would have to say I've found a ideal design for my own apartment and should work on it continuously.

Reflection and Decision 最終話

前兩個禮拜在跟我北京的leader談完後
也有機會跟我大老闆談了一下
他開門見山地問我是不是想quit
老實說我是真的有在想

但他也直接指出我只是一直想要追求我要的
但我的問題在於我不清楚知道我要的到底是什麼
所以我只要一開始這個所謂"追尋"的過程
這將會是個無止盡的過程
因為一當我們開始專注在我們所沒有的
我們就一直在匱乏的心態跟想法
但我沒想到是我已經是很幸運的了
我沒看到我手上已經有了很多的東西
我有一群value我的leaders, 同事, 家人, 朋友
所以我應該轉移我的focus到what I can give
簡單的來說就是一個giving mindset

所以這個禮拜在北京我用了一個完全不同的態度及想法跟Candidate, 客戶或同事互動
那個感覺及對方的回應完全不一樣

所以我只能說我覺得繼續在我的崗位上盡我所能
不再去強求一些還沒有答案的問題
最近讀到篇文章的topic是
Let nature take its course! Don't fight with it but flow with it!
這會是我最updated的人生態度吧!

My Type

最近大家才在問我
What type is my type?

今天台北香港的班機上看到了張震

才知道他的型是我的type

今天的他有點頹廢

ㄧ臉鬍渣髮型跟第二張照片比較類似

ㄧ看到就粉有感覺

之前老闆找我飛北京的時候

就說我既然沒時間social

在飛機上應該可以看到一些人

竟然給他說中了

不過要真的"碰"到一些人可就沒那麼簡單嚕...

Sandy & Jun's Wedding

Sandy and Jun got married last weekend when we have the biggest typhoon in Taiwan. Our gang of girls are just the Organizing Committee Members. I'm the one looking after the logistics but thanks for Emily, she is the mastermind of the whole event.

The first session is on Saturday night, 14th Sep, at a nice resort Young Lake Hotel (明湖水漾). A very nice and cosy place. We were planning a garden wedding as the view outside is very nice but we got to change to indoor because of the typhoon. Though we don't really have all the 180 guests, there were still 130 people there even though it's a STRONGEST typhoon. We were joking even Typhoon are here for Sandy and Jun's wedding.

There is another session on Sunday, 15th Sep, lunch and it's a Local Taiwanese style with KTV. This one is much easeir as we didn't need to plan any programs and the guests would just go up to SING!! That was an eye-opening event for the overseas guests. : )

I'm really happy to see Sandy find her life-time partner and because of this, she decided to move to Japan to be able to stay together with Jun. That's love and destiny I guess.

They would have another wedding ceremony in Japan next April and we are going to organize a Sakura Trip all together then. haha..

Reflection and Decision 後話(ㄧ)

剛跟我北京的leaderㄧ起用晚餐
真是對他很不好意思
在這個多事之秋還多丟了個難題給她

講完了我的想法
她的回應竟是我的更年期到了
不過這個是29轉30歲單身女性的更年期
更有趣的是
他一直在想公司內還有哪些角色我可能有興趣而且適合的
因為他覺得我這只是過度期的反應
過了30歲之後就會發覺我當初怎麼會做那樣的反應跟決定

老實說我也在想怎樣是對大家最好的安排
真的不想因為我而帶來不好的影響
好好想想...

Reflection and Decision

前兩天去誠品買書的時候看到他獨奏會的傳單
最後一次聯絡已經是一年多前的事
當時並沒有太深刻的感覺
只是無法理解為何不能當面說清楚就這樣消失
(或是我假裝沒有感覺;我已經太習慣隱藏自己的感覺及情緒)
或許對他來說沒有解釋的必要

偶而在看音樂廳節目表時會想起他
但最近發生的事及我在思考的東西讓我清楚回想起他跟我說過的話
或許真的因為他過去教練的身分或是每個進出我們生命的人都是我們的導師
我開始用不同的角度審視自己的生命及生活
也因此做了些重要的決定

一直以為我是非常的獨立、堅強、而且自主的人
但是最近才認知到我一直活在這個獨立、堅強的形象及框架裡
或許因為獨生女的原因
從小就被教育的要非常獨立、凡事靠自己
因為我沒有任何人可以依靠
而且我還要肩負起照顧父母親的責任
再加上因為身旁眾多外遇及離婚的例子
我心底對感情及婚姻是抱持著懷疑且害怕的態度

所以我越害怕便越武裝自己
我告訴自己越不在乎便越不會因為失去而痛苦
所以我埋藏我的感覺及情緒
變成了一個冷酷、冷靜、理性的人

曾經思考過為何在已明確知道我們會有的衝突下
還是決定走進那段感情
現在回想起來
我清楚知道那段時間是我開始認知及感受到那個深藏在我內心深處的真我
那個脆弱及害怕失去的小女孩
他獨特敏感的感受力
看到了那個小女孩也看透了我
但也因為我本能的掙扎、本能的想維持我那塑造出來的能幹形象
讓他在幾次嘗試之後放棄了我

而最近在工作上及生活上的幾個事件
讓我清楚的了解到
我一直生活在別人的期望中
做的事情都是為了符合大家的期望以及自己一句我怎麼可以或可能做不到
去年年初開始這份工作，剛開始的六個月是非常辛苦的
我做不出成績來
但我不相信我做不到，再加上我有個很好的mentor(現在是我的好姊姊)
我硬是拼到一個不錯的成績，但老實說裡面有很多大家的幫助

今年七月之後，因為一些事件讓我開始思考我想要什麼
老實說工作上我並不真的享受
我不覺得以我現在的經驗及能力能夠真的給予客戶及candidate建議
所以我不喜歡這種很虛的感覺
做業務最痛苦的應該就是不能deliver當初給客戶的承諾吧
八月初有個同事離職
公司高層的反應也讓我覺得我不能輕易放棄
所以我決定要撐下來
但八月中看到了一個生命逝去
讓我深刻感受到如果我不快樂、我不享受、我不喜歡
硬撐下去那又如何?
沒有人知道明天或後天會發生什麼事
如果我還繼續再做一些我不真的享受的事只是為了證明我可以而且符合大家的期望
那有什麼意義嗎?
公司曾幫我們做過指紋分析
其中一個有關於我的例子
就是個在舞台上表演的小孩
他從頭哭到尾但卻是唯一把動作都做完整也做好的小孩
但我清楚知道我不想要自己是那樣

當然我跟一些人討論這個情形
但讓我訝異又難過的是我母親的反應
當她聽到我想離開的想法
她的反應是我是個沒有責任感、懦弱、膽小、沒有能力也沒有擔當的人
怎麼可以碰到困難就想離開
她還要靠我生活、靠我養
我怎麼可以就這樣休息不工作
霎時之間我才了解到我一直生活在她期望的形象中
我必須要獨立、堅強、負責任、能幹
我必須要對她們負責、我必須要養她們、我不能就結婚另組家庭而把她們拋下
老實說，我不怪她
我可以理解她害怕被丟下的感覺

但我也因此理解到她心底從小就教育我不要相信感情及婚姻的原因
因為我另組家庭就因此離他們倆遠去
那種想要我”幸福”但又怕我丟下她的感覺
但我不想再被這些形象、期望所操縱
我只想活出我自己、過我想過而且歡喜的生活

所以我決定要休息
去做那些永遠在我wish list上卻永遠沒有時間跟機會做的事
我要去潛水(我已經四年沒下水，我不敢相信我竟然這樣對我自己)、回去斷食營、旅行、做眼睛雷射手術、調養身體回復我容光煥發的面容跟身材、做瑜珈、按摩、泡溫泉、泡書店、學跳舞、拍個人照、還要榮重慶祝我30歲生日!!

工作上我還沒跟老闆們明講我想要離職而不只是休息
因為我還不能理解他們為什麼一直想留我
我承認我工作很認真，我從不把自己只當員工而是當作自己的事業在作
所以我一定要對我的工作、事業有熱情
但我清楚看到我其實並不喜歡這份工作
只是為了證明我可以做到而一直撐下來
就算是一開始，我還清楚記的他問我為什麼要做的這麼辛苦
每次接我下班，只看到一個全身虛脫的我而感受不到我的快樂及熱情

老實說，很多話他當時跟我說我都不能接受
覺得他只是很大男人地評論我的工作、生活、及責任感
現在才知道他點出了很多我不知道也不敢去面對的問題

這兩天原本還在想應該跟公司說要休長假還是就提離職
但經過這樣的思考跟分析
我想過了三個月之後
我也不會變得喜歡這份工作
我也不想再過這樣每天忙來忙去卻空虛的日子

我想要從容優雅的過我的每一天
所以我想答案應該很明顯了

我現在其實是在香港飛北京的飛機上
前兩天還在想我星期五跟大老闆談完之後應該就不會飛了吧
但沒想到他的行程又有了改變
所以我們應該只有明天在北京才有機會談這件事吧

但我最過意不去的應該是我在北京的leader
在她們最需要協助的時候離去
但我相信這個集團及這群人可以克服所有的困難
缺一個我也不會有太多的差別的

所以接下來要想的事怎麼去創造一個可以讓我有自由生活的工作模式
在思考一些可以協助之前公司或朋友的方法
讓我可以享有自由的工作模式也可以有份收入

人真的是會改變的(我媽說我是善變的!!)
不同的階段也不同的想法
總以為我是事業心很強的
但現在覺得我是那種可以為了家庭及小孩放下事業的人
或許我現在正當在尋偶期的高峰吧!!

海角七號

很久沒有看到這麼令人驚艷的電影

就算是好萊屋巨片也沒能讓我兩個小時又十分鐘不停的笑又不停的哭

內容就不在這裡多提了

反正是推薦一定要去看的

對我來說
最近一直在思考我人生所要追求的什麼
感覺上被很多有形無形的東西牽絆著我
而在這框架中無法伸展
也看不到真正的自我

片中人物在感情上的流露
真實的面對自己的感情
應該是我最感動也是現在最該做的事吧

我不介意看第二次
所以如果還沒找到伴去看的再來問我嚕

紀念 - 畢學富教練

剛剛才收到信有關畢教練往生的消息
本來就有打算下禮拜二回去聽校友音樂會
也順便看看他

最後一次看到他是去年我去聽個音樂會的時候
但沒機會跟他打招呼
怎麼也沒想到那竟然是最後一次見到他

告別式確定是再下個禮拜三8月27日下午1時於台北市立第二殯儀館景仰廳舉行
如果剛好有看到的人
可能的話就過去送送教練吧!!

學妹有做個網頁登記音樂會跟公祭的事項
http://spreadsheets.google.com/viewform?key=paMSvdPXryN3gv5BABqzNLA

Beijing City Tour

My first time spending weekend in Beijing. It was a relaxing day yesterday after one week hard fight. So I just went for body message here yesterday afternoon. The one I went for is a local one called, Trendy Stone Spa. Other than the 60 minutes Hot Stone Spa, I also did body message. The service is ok but the facilities is considered old to me. During the message, I was told that my liver and gall are not very good as my neck and shoulder are so tight. Besides, I also have Breast Hyperplasia and the left side has more severe symptom. The therapist was jocking with me that it could be because I don't really speak out my mind to release my emotion. So the left side also where the heart is has more serious symptoms. So today, I try to relax further more as I plan it a Miniature Palace Day as I'm not yet planning to visit Forbidden City.

The first stop of the day is Yong He Gong(雍和宮). It was a residence place for one of the Qing Dynasty Empire before he assumed the Empire position and therefore, it kept this place and make it a temple for Budda.


I actually can smell the smock far far away because there are a lot of people praying there but it's not allowed to take pictures inside those temples. There are quite a number of temples there for different Budda and others. A very beautiful place to see the traditional Chinese buildings and I can imagine how magnificent Forbidden City would be.

After this, I went to Guozi Jian Street where, Confucius Temple and Guozi Jian (the highest education institutions back then), are. This street is famous for those traditional buildings/sites and the nice scene.


Confucius played a very important role in Chinese History and Culture. The concept and behavior they provoked are the guidelines for people even nowadays.

Interestingly, this statue was actually donated and devoted by a Taiwanese, 楊清欽, from Taichung 鹿港.

This is the very few places that I can take pictures inside the hall and from the setting and decoration, we can tell the Qing Style it has because of the Manchu style decoration.


Then, the next stop is Guozi Jian, the highest education institute, at that time. There is an interesting place for people to pray for their examination result to pass and enter the schools they want.



Along the street, there are some interesting cafe place and shops, that I found the interesting combination of Modern and Traditional at one of the oldest areas in Beijing.


It was very hot today and I had been sweating like hell. After visiting these few place, it's about noon time already and the next place I want to go is Price Gong's Mansion & Garden. Therefore, I decided to go Jiumen Beijing Snack Restaurant(九門小吃), where they gathered all the famous local snacks.



This place is full of people and the NO AIRCON. I was sweating like hell but I think since I've came all the way here, I just picked some interesting food to try. To be frank, I don't really find them very testy and it seems to be selling the "NAME" actually. Or maybe, it's just too hot that I can't enjoy the food.

After the snacks, I went to the Prince Kong's Mansion. It only opened up the garden side to public as the building side itself was campus for Beijing Musical School and there is nothing much left to see already. The garden was not so big though it's really quite beautiful but those in Southern China are much better I believe.



I was heading back to hotel after this as I have been walking non-stop from morning. However, the taxi driver was very chatting and shared with me some more history about Beijing as he is the so-called OLD BEIJING because they have at least 5 generations living in Beijing. He told me about the Royal Temple (東嶽廟) as that is the temple only for Royal and high level people until 1999.

So I just went as he suggested. The entrannce price is double as most of the places I visited and there is a guide bringing me along the way. This temple has been established 700 years ago and it was very famous for granting Wishes. They have 8 types of different wishes for oneself, parents and children. Since I'm here and convinced by the taxi driver, I decided to take the 8 wishes as well though the cost is quite high. So I'm would be getting better and better as I've just walked through the path all the previous emperors and famous people walked to go for their goals.

Haircut

Had haircut this evening at Franck Provost, a hair salon at Beijing. It was highly recommended by our chairman when he visited Beijing. Then our GM also tried and brought me over. It's my 2nd time doing my haircut here and I found it quite good. It's not very different from my usual hairstyle as I want to keep it long. I like the service here and it's really quite easy to manage and maintain my hair.

Malaysia Food in Beijing

Just arrived this evening after leaving from Taipei in the morning. As the direct flight between Taiwan and China is only available during weekend, I still need to transit via Hong Kong as it's a TUESDAY. So it practically takes me the whole day traveling from Home to Beijing.

This time, I also helped one of my colleagues relocated from Taipei to Beijing bring one of his luggage. Therefore, he treated me for a good dinner tonight. We went to Awana and we didn't know it's Malaysia food until we reached there but we still decided to go in as it's recommended by someone.

Food is quite OK but the price is VERY VERY high. Maybe to us, it's like any Hawker food in Singapore and Malaysia but it became a delicacy here in Beijing. We ordered one Otak-Otak (really just ONE), Nasi Lemak, Sayur Tohu, Teh Tarik to share and it costs RBM130.


Would not really recommend unless you really really hungry for Malaysia/Singapore food because of the price but it's really a good restaurant with nice food and atmosphere.

Singapore

Back in Singapore last week to register my Singapore citizenship but I didn't really get it done actually but that's the story on Monday. Let's start from the weekend as my best friend, Grace, happened to be in Singapore as well.

The hotel cost in Singapore has been more than double because of the whatever demand. So I booked Grand Central Hotel at Orchard because they offer 130nett for 7 days stay. That's considered good price based on the location. However, the hotel room is really terrible. I have very high threshold for accommodation because of my traveling experience. I can stay at backpackers place or even some those budget places but I can't really stand places old, smelly and suffocating. On that night itself, I just moved to Grace's hotel at Swissotel and of course it's much much better as it's the 5 star standard.




Swissotel is also one of my favorite places in Singapore as I really love the City Space at the 70 floor because of the view, atmosphere and the drinks there. On Sunday night, Grace and I decided to be the tourist to visit the newly open Singapore Flyer. Can't really take any picture because of the blue light inside the capsule. The conclusion is the view and atmosphere at City Space is really very good. :)


On Monday, I went to Taipei Representative office in SG to renounce my Taiwan citizenship but only then I realized that I need some other documents from the tax office and also the police. I actually checked with one of my colleagues on what to prepare for this renouncement but she total forgot about mentioning this part to me. Therefore, I didn't renounce my Taiwan citizenship and therefore can't continue with the registration part in the afternoon. When I know about this, I started to wonder if it's a sign to ask me not to do this conversion as things happen for a reason. Anyway, in the end, I still decided to do it but just not sure if Singapore government would allow me to delay until Oct as I won't be able to be there for another 5 days until next quarter.

Anyway, the only thing I realized this trip is the cost of living in Singapore is SKY HIGH right now. I used to say the taxi fare there is very cheap but nowadays it's easily double digit for any trip with all the surcharge. As to hotel, it's even more terrible. After the first 2 nights at Swissotel, I moved to Hotel Link.


This kind of place is charging SG$225 nett which is terrible to me. I would really need to book early for my usual backpacker's place at Hive Backpackers Hostel.

Taiwanese v.s. Singaporean

Going back to SG again next week as I decided to register for my Singapore Citizenship after my application 2 years ago. It was approved last June and I just got the final notice from Singapore government late May.

I have been delaying this action as I'm still thinking and working out some other possibilities to find a best way out. The main reason why I applied for the citizenship was the traveling issues I got back in SG. However, I'm currently working in Taiwan now and this might cause some issue for me as I would become "FOREIGNER". Anyway, I still decided to go for it as I can see some advantages for my work, life or family. So when I return to Taiwan on 19th Jul, I would become SINGAPOREAN. I can foresee the confusion coming along the way but worth a try I think.

Blackberry

Got my company Blackberry last Friday. Normally, only team leaders in my company would have one but our GM decided to give me one because I would start to travel between Taiwan and Beijing officialy starting from Jul 2008. It would be a great convenience on the road as internet connectivity won't be easily available anywhere especially when we got flight delayed.

I'm used to my Dopod as I have been using it for more than 3 years and there are some good application softwares such as finance or others that I've been using for years. However, these are not available on my BB because of the IT policy from the company. So I do start to think if I should get the latest HTC Touch Dimond as well because my Dopod 818pro is dying soon but the issue is I'm going to bring 2 BIG phones. Besides, I just got my Sony Ericssion 810 beginning of the year and I do enjoy it's camera function. Anyway, would find a few way out. : )

Beijing

My first trip to Beijing is about 1.5 month ago for business. Our Beijing office is officially set up in mid June and I was asked to take the position to cover both Beijing and Taiwan as we need people to work on Tech sector in Beijing. I went there twice so far to meet up with potential clients and those 2 trips were quite good so that both my supervisor and I decide to take up this task officially starting from 1st Jul 2008.

During my first trip there, I stayed back for one more day so as to walk around this CAPITAL city of China. I really like this city because of all the historical stuff that I can find and feel over there. Interestingly, our office is located at the most expensive and busy area of the city but I really love those historical sites.

I went to the Forbidden City but I didn't go in as I planned to spend 2 full days there after Olympic because they are still renovating that place.

After this, I just walked around the city as I always like to go to the local place to feel how people there live. So I had my lunch at a small lane. The bowl of noodle and the hot fried cake only cost me RMB4.5. Don't think my colleagues would be interested in this kind of place as we are used to the "HIGH CLASS' stuff but I really enjoy this part especially when traveling.



Yes, I would start the traveling life again and this time it's much more challenging because of the business and market. Not sure how long it's going to be but I don't really question so much about future as what I really care is the current moment. I do enjoy my work though it's challenging and tiring. I also decide to adjust my work style to make it more effective and efficient as well as to achieve the ultimate "work life balance" goal. it could be more difficult since I would be traveling again but I could probably find another type of lifestyle when I'm start the regional life in Beijing.

My Type...

Went to watch "Sex and the City" yesterday as I just want to know the ending of this long story. Of course, it's another "happy forever and ever" ending as that supposed to be what everyone is expecting. Only this time, I realized the reason why my girlfriends told me that BIG is my type. Yes, successful, handsome, tall, strong, rich, OLD. Those are almost everything I'm talking about. Guess that's also the reason why we all think I should open for Divorcee as nobody at my age would be able to have that kind of life experience.

Lately, my relationship becomes an interesting topic among friends and familly. I accompanied one of my close friends for furtune telling as she needs to make some decision about marridge, work and even the place to live. So I also took that chance to ask about myself. Accoridng to that one, I would only met HIM after Mar 2009 and I might only be able to get married in 2011 which is another 3 more years. However, my mom was curious and went to ask another "TEACHER". Interestingly, this one told her that I might probably get married and having kid late 2009. Beginning of the year, my ex-colleague also asked for me and that teacher said HE is around me but I just didn't know.

We sometimes went to Futune Telling becuase we are not sure of what's going to be and the best decision to make. However, these are somehow confusing if we are getting different questions, which makes the whole situation even more complicated. To me, I still believe he would be here when he is supposed to be. What I need to do is just "BE OPEN" and "BE POSITIVE".

我的容容寶貝

我們家最近多了個寶貝, 就是我大堂姐的二兒子, 因為我媽已經退休所以有空幫忙帶小孩. 我這才發覺小孩子對家庭的影響很大, 一個禮拜中那兩三天就讓我們這個小家庭熱鬧很多. 尤其是上了年紀的老人家, 越覺得生活有了新的樂趣.


所以我也加入成為了帶小孩俱樂部的一員, 從小孩子互動的動作跟聲音就很多的樂趣, 我想現在肯定的是我已經不那麼排斥生小孩, 因為這真的是生命中另一種學習跟體驗.

上個禮拜我堂姐把他帶去剪頭髮, 誰知道他竟然給人家剃光頭, 這禮拜看到時是真的嚇了一大跳, 不過他說這樣頭髮會長的更漂亮, 所以就拭目以待嚕!!